Interview: Comedian and Heart Breakfast presenter, Des Clarke

Des Clarke on his return to stand-up touring, making sense of chaos, and bucket list interviews

Your new comedy show, Life After Des, explores hitting the reset button in your forties. What have been the unexpected joys — and the tougher realities — of starting again, both personally and professionally?

One of the unexpected joys has been that lovely feeling of thinking, “You know what… I’ve still got it.” The only slight problem is I’m not entirely sure I ever had it in the first place. But there’s something really exciting about getting back on stage and rediscovering that buzz again.

The tougher reality of doing it in your forties is mostly physical. When I last toured, I don’t remember having to warm up before a comedy gig. Now I’m standing on stage for over an hour, so there’s a very real chance the show might start with a few gentle stretches. I’m basically treating the tour like a sporting event. If you see a comedian backstage doing hamstring exercises before going on, that’s probably me. But in a strange way that’s part of the fun of it – you’re older, a bit wiser, and hopefully still daft enough to give it another go.

It’s been a 10-year lead-up to touring again. Why did collecting a decade’s worth of stand-up material seem the way to go?

It wasn’t really a deliberate plan to wait 10 years. Life just took me in a few different directions during that time – radio, TV and other projects – but the funny thing about being a comedian is that you never really switch it off. You’re always watching the world, collecting stories, noticing the ridiculous details of everyday life and quietly filing them away.

In hindsight, that decade turned out to be the best research period I could have asked for. I’ve lived a lot more life in that time. And if I’m being honest, I may also have been waiting for the world to descend into complete chaos so there would be plenty to talk about. It feels like we’ve reached that point now, so it seemed like a good moment to come back and try to make sense of it all… or at least have a right good laugh about it.

After performing internationally, why did it feel important that this comeback tour was on home turf?

There’s something really special about performing stand-up at home. Scottish audiences have a brilliant instinct for comedy. We’ll laugh loudly when something’s funny, but will also let you know very quickly if it isn’t. I like that honesty. It keeps you sharp.

I’ve been lucky to play lots of brilliant venues around the world, but it felt right that the comeback tour should start back in Scotland. In great places like Edinburgh, Aberdeen and Glasgow. Those cities have been such a big part of my comedy journey. A lot of the audiences there probably saw me years ago when I first started out, so there’s a lovely full circle feeling about coming back with a new show and sharing this next chapter with them.

The show deep dives into breakdowns and breakthroughs. When you’re trying to navigate tough times, does ‘if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry’ ring true for you?

Absolutely! In fact, sometimes you end up doing both at the same time. As if you’re watching a clown juggling onions. Or when you rip your trousers at work. You’re laughing at the absurdity of it all, but there’s still a wee tear rolling down your cheek.

Comedy has always been my way of processing things. The brilliant thing about stand-up is that you can take something that felt stressful or chaotic at the time and turn it into a story that makes a room full of people laugh. It’s like emotional recycling. You take the mess and turn it into a punchline.

Doing stand-up can be perceived as pretty terrifying. What mixture of emotions are you expecting when you’re back under the bright lights, facing the audience?

A cocktail of excitement, nerves and probably a tiny bit of healthy terror. Stand-up is one of those things that never becomes completely comfortable, and that’s actually a good thing. If it ever felt easy, it probably wouldn’t be as exciting. It’s also the best laxative ever!

But there’s a real buzz that comes with it. When you step on stage and hear that first big laugh, it reminds you why you fell in love with stand-up in the first place. It’s just you, the audience and a microphone. It’s beautifully simple – a bit like myself.

What advice would you give your 30-year-old self?

I’d tell my 30-year-old self three things: stop worrying about every tiny detail, buy a load of crypto, and learn how to use a drill properly.

The first one would help my stress levels, the second one would make me financially secure, and the third one would mean I wouldn’t have to phone a professional every time something falls off a wall. At the moment my DIY skills are so poor that even IKEA instructions feel like an advanced engineering exam.

You seem to have an absolute hoot hosting Heart’s Breakfast Show. What have been some standout moments?

It’s honestly one of the most joyful jobs I’ve ever had. Every morning I get to come in and have a laugh with Adele & Grado. That kind of energy at 6.30 in the morning shouldn’t really be legal.

A lot of the best moments come from the sheer daftness of live radio. Bizarrely as part of the Heart Breakfast Show, I’ve been dressed up as an Oompa Loompa, Wednesday Addams and Little Red Riding Hood. Which is not something my younger self ever imagined would become part of a professional broadcasting career.

We’ve also had some cracking celebs drop by. Our first guest was Lewis Capaldi. We laughed a bit, cried a bit then fed him a Morton’s roll and square sausage –the perfect way to start the day.

You’ve interviewed some top names in showbiz – from Britney Spears to Ed Sheeran. Who would you still love to meet?

It would have to be the icon that is Sir Billy Connolly. For me, he’s the greatest stand-up comedian ever. Growing up in Glasgow, seeing someone from my own city with the same accent become a global comedy legend was hugely motivating. It made stand-up feel possible.

He also has that magical ability to swear in a way that’s somehow both poetic and absolutely hilarious. Nobody tells a story like the Big Yin. He’s a true Scottish legend.

Life After Des tour dates: